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January/February 2011 Spirituality
Find Your Soul Mate

by Arielle Ford

What does it take to manifest the love of your life?

I’ve heard from first-time brides (at 49 and older!), from busy entrepreneurs whose 80-hour-a-week work schedules left little time for romance, and from divorcees and widowers who were convinced that the opportunity for true love had long passed them by. Those who have successfully manifested their soul mates did so by finding a healthy balance between intending and allowing, between doing and being.

Not only did they do the necessary work, they made soul mate lists, cleaned up the emotional baggage still lingering from past relationships and made space for their beloved’s presence in every area of their lives. But they also cultivated a state of what the Buddhists call “beginner’s mind.”

Arielle Ford

They carried out manifestation exercises and rituals with an attitude of openness, eagerness and an absence of preconceptions. Even if their hearts were still aching from a past breakup or their present circumstances were less than ideal, they didn’t allow themselves to fall into the common trap of thinking that they’d already done and tried everything, and therefore nothing new would work for them. They stayed open to the possibilities and remained hopeful, not defeated.

Becoming a successful manifestor — whether you want to manifest love, money, a new career or simply a parking space — requires a certain level of emotional maturity. Great manifestors have learned the art of managing their thoughts and emotions so that even when doubt, fear or other limiting feelings pop up, they are not swept into a spiral of negativity. Developing this kind of mental discipline requires us to make a deliberate choice to focus our attention on what we desire rather than on what we don’t want.

For example, whenever I catch myself dwelling in a negative or unpleasant thought or feeling, I say to myself cancel-cancel, and I then intentionally create a new vision for myself. Sometimes this simple shift in perception is all I need, and other times I reach into my toolkit of emotional release techniques and dedicate five or 10 minutes to working through my mini-issue so that my creative energies stay aligned with the outcome I desire.

As someone who is consciously focused on manifesting your soul mate, you too must Recognize the powerful influence your thoughts and feelings have on your point of attraction, and do your best to keep them positive.

The process of magnetizing your soul mate can get discouraging at times. But if you’re approaching it from the mindset of “it’s been a year and it still hasn’t happened,” you’re living in the reality of what’s missing. The universe simply can’t add more love to your life when you’re focused on the love you don’t have.

Like the old tale of the farmer pulling up the newly planted seed to search for evidence of growth, the very act of searching evokes a feeling of desperation that blocks the natural flow of love. But if you can shift your focus to magnetizing your soul mate rather than looking for him or her, and if you can adjust your emotional state from impatience to savoring the waiting, love will blossom in its own time.

Arielle Ford is the author of The Soulmate Secret: How to Manifest the Love of Your Life with the Law of Attraction. Visit www.soulmatesecret.com. Ford offers “The Ultimate Soulmate Summit,” a free online teleseries to help people magnetize their soul mate by Valentine’s Day. Visit www.ultimatesoulmatesummit.com.