May/June 2006 Living Now
Could You Forgive The Unforgivable?
Forgiveness and Child Abuse

by Dr. Lois Einhorn

Would you forgive your parents if they ritually and sadistically abused you throughout your childhood?

That's the question posed in a new book by Dr. Lois Einhorn. And the answers come from some of the most influential figures of our times. They include Dr. Bernie Siegel, attorney Gerry Spence, former UN Secretary Kurt Waldheim, Rabbi Steven Jacobs, Dr. Patch Adams, boxer Rubin "Hurricane" Carter, Arun Gandhi and many others.

The question is not hypothetical, as readers learn in the first chapter of Forgiveness and Child Abuse: Would YOU Forgive? Dr. Einhorn's childhood was a horror-show of abuse at the hands of her parents. She was beaten, sexually violated, forced to take enemas and eat feces, as well as torture and kill pets and destroy favorite stuffed animals. She was also required to compete in contests with her sister where the loser had to physically torture the winner.

The abuse began when Dr. Einhorn was a toddler and continued until she left home at age seventeen. Why didn't she resist when she got older? That question still torments Dr. Einhorn even though her father threatened to kill her mother and sister if she disclosed the abuse to anyone.

During her healing process, which still continues, Dr. Einhorn shared her story with influential people from a variety of fields. She asked them: What would you do? You are a child in a family that sadistically abuses. You are forced to torture and destroy. What should you do now as an adult? Do you forgive your parents? How do you forgive yourself?

Fifty-three contributors responded with a wide range of opinions and viewpoints. The result is a unique and powerful book destined to encourage discussion, dialogue and debate. In an era when one out of three girls and one out of seven boys are sexually abused by the age of eighteen, Forgiveness and Child Abuse is an essential read for anyone interested in the welfare of our nation's children.

Overcoming her hellish childhood, Dr. Einhorn has served as a Professor of Communication at the State University of New York at Binghamton for the past 27 years. She was honored as a 2004 Heroine of Forgiveness, Reconciliation and Peace by the World Forgiveness Alliance in 2004. She shares that honor with previous award recipients Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Nelson Mandela and Desmond Tutu. Dr. Einhorn is widely recognized as an expert on the topic of forgiveness.

Forgiveness and Child Abuse, 214 pages, $22.95, is published by Robert D. Reed Publishers, P.O. Box 1992, Bandon, OR 97411. Phone: (541-347-9882. Fax: (541-347-9883. Website: www.rdrpublishers.com. The book is also available at bookstores and online.