May/June 2004 Spirituality
A Celebration of Life

by Freddy Gerow

I have worked as a Registered Nurse for 40 years, but only recently discovered a new calling to combine my nurse’s instinct for relieving pain with my spirituality. Since I'm also a non-denominational minister, four years ago a friend of mine called and asked if I would officiate at a funeral service for her father. A bit taken aback, I agreed and met with the family to learn about their father prior to putting together the service. The service was held in the chapel at the funeral home and also at the graveside. Even though this was the first time I officiated at a funeral, I felt I had really found a niche. The family was very pleased and a friend commented, "It’s obvious you were in your element."

A few days later one of the funeral directors phoned to compliment me and asked if I had Celebrant training. I hadn’t, and he suggested I take the training. When I did, I discovered I had a calling for performing Celebrations of Life.

I am no stranger to grief. By the time I was 25 years old, I had lost 4 significant people in my life – each one a loss in the true meaning of the word. As a result, I have developed tremendous compassion for the grieving, and faith that there is a new day, life does go on, and we are enriched with every experience.

I loved performing this service for the family and friends of the deceased. It is particularly pleasing to capture the essence of a man and what he felt was important. Eulogies are such a beautiful opportunity to review the richness of a person's life with family members and others, and to remember the memorable and the significant. Demonstrating the deceased person's values and their value in the community is healing in and of itself.

Learning the life story of the deceased, their personality, their values and what they brought to the community (everyone does in their own way) is a very enriching experience. When I leave there I feel as if I know the deceased and always wish I had met them while they were still walking the earth in the physical. I have met with the most interesting families.

When a family death occurs people need some kind of spiritual support in dealing with the funeral. Many people do not have a church or a clergy person to call on. Others may not be comfortable with a traditional religious memorial/funeral ceremony or may want to have it at home or in an alternate location. The important thing is to honor and celebrate each life in a way that is personal, meaningful and comforting to the survivors.

Contact Freddy Gerow at 360-693-9102 or 503-704-0218.