September/October 2003 Alternative Health
Issues of Growing OlderAt Any Age
by Carol McMichaels
My jaw almost dropped, as into my office walked a young womanId
guess twenty five or so, and drop dead gorgeous. Stylishly cut shiny
blond hair, bottle green eyes, beautiful face, lightly tanned flawless
skin, medium height, slim and shapely. A perfect ten by all American
This lovely creature had come to me because she was suffering, really
suffering from the fear of Getting Old. To her, thirty was scarily
close to Old. Forty rang the death knell of life as she knew it! And
in preparation for that awful state, she craved guidance about spiritual
matters, assuming that her spiritual nature was all shed have
remaining after passing forty.
An extreme case? Yes. Nevertheless, a sorry indication of our societys
adulation of youth, and its still active diminution of the joys and
value of older years.
My young client thought of aging as Getting Oldsomething that
happened to her against her will and with absolutely no benefits. I
suggested to her that she think, instead, of Growing Older. I
had her recall times as a child when being told "when youre
older you can
" signified the magic world of the grown
up who could do anything she chose to do! A time when "older"
meant coveted privileges.
Yet, there are real issues we encounter all along the path as age progresses.
Many, such as visible physical changes, are universal and distressing.
Others, dealing with small and large personal pasts often are assumed
by others either never to have existed, or to have been already dealt
Some people sail unscathed through all the changes like Pollyana, viewing
everything through rose colored glasses. Theres much to recommend
in that attitude as long as it doesnt mask valid emotions such
as anger, loss, guilt and so forth.
Probably a larger number of aging people simply look at the changes,
losses, separations, and cope. One of the advantages to having lived
longer is that coping becomes more doable.
I find that life becomes easier to live as I grow older. I know so
very much more than I ever conceived. And I know it first hand. Ive
Lets look at some of the advantages of having been on this earth
for many years.
Theres something to be said for "been there, done that".
The broader view of events that comes with experience provides us with
many more options than we saw as inexperienced youngsters.
Having witnessed occasions when nothing much was done, yet things worked
out well, enables us to see the possible value of patience.
The drama - that powerful, scintillating drama - can be given over
to the thunder and lightning in favor of a somewhat boring, but rewarding
sense of creative calm.
We can relinquish our internal demand for control in all situations,
realizing that it just aint possible. We can control only some
things, letting the Universe take care of the rest.
For those who were head turners, the change to being an ordinary mortal
unworthy of a turned head can offer a welcome relief from the pressure
of always being "On".
We simply dont give a fig that we may appear foolish because
we entertain "outrageous, implausible, impossible" concepts
at odds with our left brain, concretist society.
In fact, we give little consideration to opinions others have of us,
because we feel entitled to and capable of being whatever we are, without
apology. Weve earned it!
Our creativity flourishes. Now released from the shoulds of conventional
expectations, it can find its particular direction and be enjoyed, not
only for its product, but simply for its existence.
We learn that intention can heal in many different ways. And that there
are some things it cannot move.
Acceptance of ourselves and of others releases long held tensions and
allows both earthly love and spiritual love and connection to flow effortlessly
Life as we know it may indeed pass. But, as were bound to "git
on with it" - like it or not - we may as well savor the process!
Carole McMichaels offers workshops and private sessions on Life
Problem Solutions, using Energy Psychology Techniques. Please call 503-466-1085