January/February 2003 Living Now
Job Hunting 101 – a lesson in self-awareness

by Connie Bowen

"What I am seeking is seeking me" has been my watchword the past few weeks. I knew I needed to change my current job, so I gave my notice and a month later I was reading the want ads just like hundreds of other people. I had retired years before from my full-time career as a court reporter and had been looking for new meaning in my work ever since. At my last position, I had the oddest feeling whenever I put the key in the door of the office that I just shouldn’t be there anymore. The time had come for me to pursue another opportunity and that would pave the way for someone else to fill my shoes at my current job. The feeling became stronger and stronger as I pushed it into the back of my mind and continued to work there. Finally I decided this inner voice was definitely guiding me and I needed to listen for my own health and well-being.

"This will be easy," I thought. "With my skills and talents, I’ll be able to find something perfect in no time." Little did I dream that the process of "job hunting" would be a winding, challenging path.

On the recommendation of a friend, I went to the Capitol Career Center on Walker Road, which was a huge help in giving me the tools to begin my search. I realized I knew very little about just what the perfect job for me really was. I thought it would be something part-time with flexible hours and with less of a commute. Other than that, I had no idea what my heart’s desire would be. While at the center, I went through the Holland personality test that started me on my path to realizing more specifically what my interests were. I began faxing resumes to blind mailbox ads in the Oregonian and visiting an endless array of employment agencies. With each agency I was given a "test" of my skills and with each one I began to improve my skills, checking out books from the library and practicing at home. I went to one workshop on "Interviewing" skills at the Capitol Career Center and gained a vast knowledge of techniques, but secretly I hoped I would never need them. "How can I memorize all these answers to questions and do’s and don’ts?" I thought hopelessly.

The day did come when I had a very important interview for a part-time job near my home – a job that to all around me seemed like a "perfect" match. I was one of 9 who were interviewed out of 122 who applied. I dressed the part, just like my workshop had told me to do. I donned the clothes I hoped I would never wear again – the pantyhose, heels, tight belt and pearls with a dress I actually had to dust off to wear – and smiled my smile when told I would be occasionally doing meaningless, repetitive tasks and nodded an assurance to the interviewer that working sometimes until 11:00 pm taking meeting minutes at night hearings was just my cup of tea. I maintained wonderful eye contact, all the while the big toe on my right foot was going numb and my shiny black belt was cutting off all hope of taking a deep breath. I was the picture of studied perfection at doing everything right – but certainly not true to my heart. Where was the answer to my heart’s yearnings in all this job searching? Did I have a right to even look for it?

My counselor at the Career Center mentioned I should read "What Color Is Your Parachute" which I had heard of years before, but didn’t know what the book was about. Sure enough, just like for 6 million other readers, this book was a godsend for direction and meaning. I hardly knew myself and my needs; how could I hope to find what I was looking for? I followed all the exercises religiously, spending hours tallying lists of what was important in my life and examining myself deeply to find out just exactly what I had to offer an employer and where and when I wanted to use just what skills. The graph from the book that was especially eye-opening for me was the one that showed the last step an employer will take to find a new employee is to place an ad in the paper which is the first place all the job hunters usually go. The graph showed that the first place an employer is likely to search is through networking.

I had let my network dwindle to nothing as I kept my nose to the grindstone with my previous work and family responsibilities. But just where did I want to network? I began with my greatest love in the values and goals exercise in the book – metaphysics. I began calling and visiting with like-minded people on the phone, each one leading me to more leads. I filled little notebooks of this and that and had notes and scraps of paper everywhere with names, ideas and locations. I knew I was getting closer – but to what? Would this job elude me forever? The weeks dragged on.

Out of desperation I answered an ad for a legal word processor. Just the thought made me cringe, but wasn’t this where I had the most experience and training? I answered the blind ad – a most disturbing process in itself, sending a résumé out into space, never to be heard from again – and was rewarded with a call and an interview. Sitting opposite my would-be employer I was asked "What would be your dream job?" This time, determined to answer honestly, I replied "Something fun and creative with flexible hours that is a help to humankind, where I can use my art training and my inclination to motivate and inspire others. That’s the job of my dreams." "Well, this ain’t it," he said flatly. I had to agree. He eventually found the person who would sit in his designated chair and type from 8:30 till 5:00 and then go home and turn around the next day and do it again and again and again. "Someone will like that job" I told myself. It will put food on the table for their family.

The staffing specialist at one staffing company had been a former human resources manager and helped me redo my résumé to better reflect who I was – who I had learned I was through doing the exercises in "What Color Is Your Parachute." My skills were growing and so was my confidence.

I looked through the Business Journal and learned of a group called "Job Finders Support Group" at the Capitol Hill Library that meets every Friday from noon till 2:00. I felt sheepish walking in, but after a few minutes I felt right at home. The faces looking back at me from around the table knew what I was going through and had many suggestions of their own to help me. We traded cards and leads and mutual support. I teamed up with a woman who was looking for full-time work in the same areas where I was looking for part-time. We corresponded via e-mail flashing ideas back and forth. How grand to not have to go it alone anymore.

With each step I’ve taken, I’ve learned more about myself, what I want to do and how I want to spend the rest of my work life. It has been an invaluable lesson in honest self-examination.

I remember getting ready to go to one interview all dressed up in my professional dress and hearing my son say to me, "Is that really you, Mom?" I had to answer "No, it isn’t, but . . ." "What price is the ‘but’?" I thought.

Another way I’ve changed this whole process for myself from a negative experience into a positive one is to remind myself, instead of "looking for a job", to turn it around to "how can I serve?" I check in with my heart now more often and realize my true success lies there. I don’t want to have that feeling when I put my key in the office door six months from now and have to start all over again.

Who am I serving? And how do I want to serve? Who am I and how best can I be myself? After all, "What I am seeking is seeking me."

Resources:
www.jobhuntersbible.com - from the author of "What Color is Your Parachute;" good links and information.
www.geocities.com/theusgroup - The Us Group is a support group that meets every Tuesday from 9:30 a.m. to 11:00 a.m. at the Shilo Inn - 9900 S.W. Canyon Blvd, Beaverton.
www.oef.org - the Oregon Entrepreneurs Forum - to meet and network with small business owners (503-222-2270).
www.1stop.org/washco/capcenter - the Capital Career Center at 18624 N.W. Walker Road, Room 1522, Beaverton (503-533-2713)

Connie Bowen can be contacted at cbowen@europa.com.