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May/June 2002 Spirituality
Ego

by Sri Siva

Many people fail in life because of their ego awareness. Let us try to understand what ego is.

1. Ego is “I” consciousness.
2. “I am right; you are wrong” feeling.
3. I must be in control and making decisions and not you.
4. Fanatical and irrational attachment to one's views.
5. Greed.

There are many more manifestations, but the above 5 categories are fundamental to understand and deal with the ego awareness. I am going to illustrate each of them.

Ego is “I” consciousness.

Everyone has a concept of who they are. Usually your identity comes from your name, your vocation, and your relationship with others. Identification with all these categories enslaves you and increases your ego identity. The truth of the matter is that you simply don't exist.

Ramaha Maharishi taught the technique of inquiring “Who am I?” The process involves answering for yourself this question and realizing: I am not the body, I am not the mind, and I am not this. I am not that. In the final analysis, you come to the conclusion that you are Brahman or God. Ramana Maharishi lived this all his life.

However, I don't want you to live exactly like Ramana Maharishi, just use his technique. No doubt, he was enlightened in his own way, but he failed in other areas. His health was poor, and he was a vegetable. It was OK for him as he renounced all obligations and desire for action.

Nevertheless, you can use Ramana Maharishi's technique to shock your “I consciousness.” Your “I consciousness” is a big tension now. Carry on an inner dialogue within yourself constantly: “I am not this body; I am not this mind.” This will do immense good for you. Ego is separation from God. In Tamil, ego is described as “munaippu” - protrusion. Protrusion is existence coming out of non-existence.

“I am right; you are wrong” feeling.

You go for a driver's test or a job interview. You fail. What is your common reaction? Most people's first response is “feeling hurt.” This eventually turns into abuse. You then begin to “speak French” or swear. You are now satisfied because you have released your hurt feelings. Your ego feels good.

Truthfully, nobody is right or wrong, or everybody is right and everybody is wrong. God created the grass, cow, tiger and human beings. The cow eats the grass. The tiger kills the cow and eats it. Man hunts the tiger. For God there is no contradiction in all of this. I remember the closing lines from Robert Browning's poem, “Pippa's Song” in his work “Pippa Passes”:

“The lark's on the wing;
The snail's on the thorn;
God's in His heaven--
All's right with the world!”

Don't ever get attached to anything including your view, which you feel is 100% correct. You will then create a center. If someone says that you are wrong and screwed up, accept it gladly and thank that person whole-heartedly. Normally people don't do this. You use swear words and challenge the other person.

I remember reading that someone asked Sai Baba, “How come you are not disappointed?” His answer was: “You have a point. You disappoint. I have no point, and so I don't disappoint.” The point is that you should be pointless. When I was explaining this once to an audience, someone stood up and said: “If tomorrow, I were to go and tell my boss I am pointless, I will lose my job.” I responded to him in the following way: “It is good that you lose your job. Your boss will be happy to lose a bad employee.” The crowd laughed.

However, the guy was hurt. He couldn't laugh because I told him he was a bad employee. If he were willing to accept that he was indeed a bad employee, he would not have felt miserable. The whole human existence is just a bunch of ego-reactions. Those who succeed are those who get beyond their ego. Don't be passionate in arguing your case. You may lose your job, your friends, even your spouse.

“I must be in control and making decisions and not you.”

Everyone wants to control the other person. It is a totally foolish idea. However, people are somehow interested in controlling others. Spouses want to control each other and their children. I am not saying that there shouldn't be any control, although it would be a desirable state. However, humanity has not yet grown to that level. We still have a lot of animal heritage in terms of behavior. Just as the animals in homes and at the zoos are controlled, we need to be controlled. Policing, the idea of crime and punishment, evolved out of the need to control animal behavior.

An enlightened person will never want to control anyone. I have read in the “Tao Te Ching” by Lao Tzu that the best government is that which doesn't govern. A control freak is not a strong person. He/she is weak and fearful. The need to control, more often than not, is based on self-preservation. Control freaks need to do some self-analysis. “Why am I controlling my wife/son/employee? Am I dependent on them for love and service?” Everyone should ask these questions to attain freedom from the unconscious longing for control.

Fanatical and irrational attachment to views.

Osho tells the story of some philosophers trying to escape a Russian prison. They managed to get the key to the prison and waited for midnight to set in to make their move. At midnight, the philosopher who had the key came back and sadly reported that they could not possibly use the key to open the prison door. The others asked if the key wasn't working. The philosopher replied that the drunken prison guard had left the prison door open, and the philosopher's problem was how to open the prison door with the key, when the door was already open.

In reality, everyone is screwed up. Everyone has a paradigm and thinks it is the right one. You must understand that your attraction to your paradigm comes from lifetime after lifetime. It is not that you are wise/foolish right now. You have always been that way.

Attachment to ideology is often irrational, and irrationality is a behavioral trait rooted in past life actions. If you are a politician now, you had been one before. I am not saying that a politician is a better breed than a janitor. Spiritually speaking, they are both sparks from God, and politically both have only one vote each.

A fanatical view is a dead behavior. Life is movement. It is changing every moment. Heraclites said that you can't step into the same river a second time. But in reality you can't even step in once because it has already changed.

Religion, culture and tradition are often a continuation of irrational habits. You simply accept them because you grew up with them. Change is very important for growth. Gone are the days when we rode on bullock carts, practiced in-breeding and obeyed the tribal chieftains. Democracy requires independence and free thinking. In order to self-evaluate if you are fanatical, prepare a check list of your fanaticism in the areas of religion, culture and tradition. Once you create this checklist, you may be able to change them.

Greed.

Most of you know the story of King Midas. He obtained the boon that whatever he touched would turn into gold. The boon turned out to be a nightmare. Midas could not even eat. Many wealthy people are greedy. That's why or how they became wealthy. Gandhi held the opposite view. He said, “If you have more than you require, you are a thief.” No wonder Gandhi was a poor man! Greed is a sin that hardens your heart and boosts up your ego whereas giving and sharing open the heart and reduce ego."

To learn more about Sri Siva, his teachings, seminars and /or meditation products, please visit our website, www.vaaaksounds.com.