March/April 2002 Spirituality
Peace is a Process

by Larraine Brannan

You want to live in a peaceful world and decide to become proactive by joining a peace group. Well, pack your sense of humor and open mind, fasten your seat belt and hang on, because you are in for a ride!

Mary Button, Freddy Gerow and I are co-chairs of the all volunteer One Day of Peace Coalition. Our mission is to spread the word about the new One Day Holiday and plan the Portland celebrations. In cooperation with the Oregon Peace Institute, we just held the first One Day of Peace Holiday Celebration at the Chiles Center on January 1, 2002! What a joy it was to see it come to completion so beautifully—the reward for all the dedication and work.

In order to reach this goal we faced many challenges, all of them opportunities for personal growth. The larger the group became, the more challenges we faced. I would like to share what we learned from this experience.

When we called this group together, we assumed it would peaceful. After all, we were all peacemakers. Undoubtedly we thought we were “better than” the people waging war. We discovered we are just like everyone else in the world. We have similar fears and limiting belief systems. We found ourselves and others falling into being attached (ego), which led to judgment, which led to blame, which led to suffering and pain (anger, resentment, guilt, shame, etc.). The more attached we were to a specific outcome, the more pain experienced. Attachment to being right and the judgment it leads to may be the underlying causes of war. We certainly were experiencing this dynamic as the microcosm of the macrocosm. Some came and left the group quickly because of the discord. The tendency was to feel ashamed because we weren’t “peace-full”. Finally we saw that peace is not the absence of conflict. Peace is really about how we choose to respond when conflict arises.

In retrospect, we see how essential it is to have a plan of action in place before problems appear. This plan would include group agreement to discuss any issue directly with the other party, to take responsibility for the role they played in the misunderstanding, to listen without a personal agenda, to participate in some form of conflict resolution when all else fails, and to treat each other with respect and compassion throughout. The real key here is practicing good communication with clear, honest, compassionate speaking and clear, detached, compassionate listening. We must really hear another’s story. A real desire to know why, leads to understanding. Understanding leads to compassion. Compassion leads to making choices for the good of all concerned, which ultimately leads to true Peace.

While I feel bringing the idea of celebrating a national Peace Day to the public’s attention is important, I believe the personal transformation that occurs for each one of us who choose to be involved is even more important. As one of our members said, he learned that the journey was far more important than the destination. It was not an easy year. We all had to commit to doing our own work around peace. We have learned that peace is about being willing to examine our own limiting beliefs, attachments, judgments and pain and to take personal responsibility for transforming them. It’s about being willing to listen to a differing point of view and trying to understand. It’s all about recognizing ourselves in others and being compassionate about our collective humanness. Conflict exists within us and we must learn to embrace it, accept it and choose not to let it rule our lives. Until then, we will never be at peace with ourselves as human beings. Until then, we will never be able to feel compassion for our fellow human beings who are still suffering so deeply from their unconsciousness. Until then we will never be able to feel unconditional love for ourselves and others. Until then we will never be one in body, mind and spirit. These are the lessons of spirit we have been experiencing this past year. This is the most important work we will do. Peace does begin with us. And we can be sure that if we call ourselves peacemakers, we will have to face those parts of ourselves that are not in alignment with that statement. That is the power of intention!!

If you do choose to get involved, these are my suggestions for staying balanced throughout this journey. Maintain a sense of humor and adventure. Laugh more, play more, experience more joy. Be more like the little child. Take time for yourself. Rejuvenate. Take time for prayer and contemplation. Say no to overdoing. Trust your intuition. Do what you love within the organization - express your passion. Take responsibility for your own needs. Ask for help. Be in gratitude.

As we move forward in our lives, let us never forget that our contribution makes a difference - after all, there is only one of us here!

For more information about the One Day of Peace Coalition, call 503-293-3186, email info@onedayofpeace.net or visit our website at www.onedayofpeace.net. We are planning for January 1st, 2003 and have an ongoing children’s book project and children’s peace quilt project. We have the vision of celebrations taking place all over Oregon and the U.S. next year and can use help in spreading the word. We are happy to share all materials and ideas. For information about classes in Compassionate Listening and Conflict Resolution, call Oregon Peace Institute at 503-725-8192.